The truth is, I don’t run out of words very often.  Usually, I have something to say, and frankly, should probably keep my mouth shut more often.  In fact, I can count the moments when my world stopped and words swept from my mind.

 

~Seeing my handsome groom at the end of the aisle, waiting to marry me. 

 

~The birth of my children.

 

~The day, in Russia, when God spared us from attackers who would have killed us.

 

~Watching my eldest son take the stage, head shaved, as Daddy Warbucks and realizing he’d grown up.

 

~Listening to my daughter sing the national anthem.

 

~Watching my middle son plow through the defense the first time he ran for a touchdown.

 

~The day my youngest son sat down on the sofa, unbidden, put his arm around me and said, you’re a great mom.

 

~And…when Danica Favorite read my name as the ACFW Mentor of the Year.

 

No words. 

 

Brilliant moments that spoke to my heart in the voice of Grace and took away anything I could have said in response. 

 

I am still speechless.  But I’m going to try to find some words, the ones trapped in my heart.  

 

I live in one of the most beautiful places on the planet – in a carved out section of woods in northern Minnesota on a hilltop that overlooks Lake Superior.  It’s quiet, only the rush of the wind in the trees.  At night, the sky is so dark the stars seem just an arm’s length away.  Right now, jeweled leaves in orange, gold and ruby red blanket my dirt driveway, and the air smells of wood smoke and the loamy bouquet of autumn.  I wish you could all come and visit. 

            My favorite part about living here are the sunrises and midnights viewed from my deck.  In the early morning, I take a cup of coffee and watch the dawn syrup through the trees and across the cedar planks to kiss my toes.  It’s where I have my devotions and it awakens my day to the Source of joy.  At night, after the house is quiet, I wander outside again and sit in an Adirondack chair to watch the stars and listen to the wind.  They remind me that while God grants us each day, they all lead one by one into eternity. 

            The thought of eternity takes my words away again. 

            I sit there and I think about the fact that this life is just the beginning.  That there is more, and what I do in this life matters for the next.  That the choices I make here affect me forever.  It makes me grateful for amazing grace and the gift of salvation.

            Then I begin to feel it…the panic for those who won’t have eternity with their loved ones, with their Savior.  The ones who don’t know about grace, or who don’t understand it.  The people I love who say…this is all there is.  No! It’s not!

            But what can I do about it?  

Well, I guess I can tell stories.  And maybe help other people tell stories.  Those are the tools God has given me.  See, it’s in that moment when the Voice of Grace takes my words away that I realize He’s already prepared me, poured back into me the words I need to tell the truth.  His words, I hope.

See, I love to write.  I love to teach.  And in my heart, I believe that fiction changes lives.  More than that, I believe there is no reason why a story written by a Christian, a person filled with the Spirit of God, shouldn’t be the most well written story on the shelves.  As an author, I must strive to throw down roadblocks – poor writing, poor characterization, a shallow faith journey – so that nothing stands in the way of someone reading my book.  I don’t believe in agenda fiction – I believe in a great story, with a character who is on a journey to find truth.  I point them – and hopefully the reader – in the right direction.  And I try to help others do the same.  See, the world is getting darker and I believe we believers have to figure out how to shine.

I love Galatians 6:7-8.  Do not be deceived:  God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.  Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.  Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially those who belong to the family of believers.

All I have in my “missionary” toolbox is a desire to tell a great story and a desire to help others do the same.  I’m not unaware that it’s God’s grace yet again that allows me to do both.

It’s another wordless moment.

 

Thank you again for choosing me as the ACFW Mentor of the Year. 

Susie May