by Kariss Lynch, @Kariss_Lynch

You’ve probably read at least one blog about preparing for a writing conference by now. Before my first conference (and even before my second), I was a Googling fiend. On the practical side, have a business card, create a one-sheet, practice a 30-second pitch, and go ready to take notes. But after several years of going to conferences and writing retreats, I don’t think that’s the most important list to follow. So, I’m going to offer another list, one that is slightly less tangible but potentially even more important.

1. Check your insecurity at the door. And by the door, I am referring to the door of your home. Don’t walk out of the house with it. I still get nervous preparing for a conference. I met an agent and editor and signed with both at a conference. I know what can happen. But I have also had several years of seeing no movement from those meetings besides good conversation and networking. I fear rejection and not being liked. But I found that the years I go prepared to ask more about others and encourage them in their journeys, I am encouraged and build relationships in the process. The more we are for others instead of solely for our own agenda, the more we see our careers thrive. 
2. Go ready to make relationships, not just built connections. If you’ve been to a conference, you’ve probably been at a table where everyone begins exchanging business cards. Full transparency: I lose those and very rarely look at them again when I return home. The connections that stick in this crazy writing business are the ones that become relationships. You won’t click with everyone, but you will click with some, and those are the ones to develop. They will become your critique partners, encouragers, email and text buddies (my phone is constantly dinging throughout the day), and your creative colleagues. They are the ones who will “get it” – all the intricacies of writing. There’s nothing wrong with passing business cards. They can be helpful and good references. But connections don’t always stick. Relationships will.
3. Pray as you plan. As you prepare, pray. Pray for the editors and agents you will talk to, not only that you would find favor but that they would have wisdom and compassion as they listen to hundreds of pitches. Pray for the people you will meet, that God will encourage them and that He would bring the right people to enjoy this journey with you. Pray for the conference staff and speakers. Pray that your story will find the right home at the right time and that God would be glorified in the process. Pray for the publishing industry – they release content that impacts people’s hearts and minds.

Writing conferences can be some of the most rejuvenating few days or some of the most discouraging, depending on how you choose to approach them. Your checklists are important! But what you do while you are preparing is even more important. Trust me, you’ve got this!

Kariss Lynch is the author of the Heart of a Warrior series and writes contemporary romance about characters with big dreams, adventurous hearts, and enduring hope. In her free time, she hangs out with her family and friends, explores the great outdoors, and tries not to plot five stories at once. Connect with her at karisslynch.com, or on Facebook, Instagram, or Goodreads.