When I was younger, I used to bite my nails because of fear or anxiety. They’d bleed, become infected and generally look terrible. My grandma, a farmer’s wife, used to put black salve on them to help with the infection.
As I grew older, I learned better coping mechanisms for dealing with fear and anxiety such as prayer, talking with others, and refocusing my perspective. And my nails grew. Because of my profession, I need to keep my nails short, but they’re still trimmed, neat, and polished when the mood strikes.
However, yesterday, I found myself picking at a nail fragment on my ring finger. I kept tugging on it until it pulled free. This morning, I have an “owie” (I work with small children, so that’s a normal part of my vocabulary.) on the side of my finger.
The last thirteen months have been some of the toughest in my life while on back to back book deadlines, including losing my dad, my mom dealing with major heart issues and other health problems, another family member battling cancer, and a host of other issues that have worn me down. My spirit is weary. My body is tired. And some days, I just want to binge on Netflix and tune out the world.
All of us deal with stress and anxiety in different ways. Some people hide behind humor. Some hide behind addiction to alcohol, tobacco, drugs, or even food. Regardless, dealing with these feelings and emotions is necessary so we’re not being swallowed up by the world around us. Sometimes a person going through more serious emotions like those needs the help of a doctor or professional therapist. There’s no shame in that.
Last night I talked with a friend for an hour on the phone. She called to check in. We talked about what was happening in our lives, and she said she’d be praying for the joy of the Lord to be my strength. She also asked me what blessings I had experienced recently. It was so easy to rattle those off. And listing them buoyed my spirits.
When external circumstances battle with our internal emotions, it’s so easy to succumb to the negativity. There are times when fear feels very real to us. However, facing our fears will help with lessening the anxiety surrounding them. Take time to talk with someone. Share how you’re feeling. Meditate on Scripture, and go to God in prayer. He understands us, loves us, and wants to help us through these dark valleys. Once we understand the underlying causes, we can refocus our perspectives and use correct strategies to overcome our anxieties to regain our confidences in order to move forward with our lives.