There are two words every writer dreads. Negative criticism. Throwing our art, and our heart, out into the world is daunting. I remember the first time I emailed a portion of my unfinished manuscript to someone, I thought I might pass out, or throw up, or both—and that was to someone really nice!

Whenever you put your story into the world someone will criticize. Period. Anonymous judges in contests that shred your work. Agents that don’t see the potential and turn you down. Editors that point out the flaws and holes in your story. Reviewers who just who don’t like what you write.

No one likes to be told that they are wrong, or not up to par, or that they still have a lot to learn. And there will always be someone out there who does not like your style or your voice or who disagrees with you. Take a few minutes and peruse great, critically acclaimed works out there on a large retail site—Everyone gets one-star reviews. Everyone.

But what if instead of dreading being told there is something wrong with our stories, we embrace it? What if instead of being frustrated or angry when someone just “doesn’t get it”, we are grateful? What if being fearful of someone attacking our hard work, we look forward to the growth we can gain from the experience?

How can we flip the switch and look at negative criticism in a positive way?

I think there are a few things that we can focus on and questions we can ask ourselves, instead of dwelling on the hurt.

Ask yourself first: What can I learn from this negative criticism? Can I sift through the disapproval to find something I can work on? We are not perfect people, we will always be learning, so glean some new wisdom and let the rest go.

Next ask yourself: Is this person my audience? Perhaps the critic doesn’t like first person present POV, or they don’t like your religious views, or they can’t stand historicals or they normally only read suspense and were bored by your literary style. Not everyone has the same taste. And that’s okay! Write for the person your story is meant for, the person who needs your message, and let go of the impossible need to please everyone.

Then ask yourself: How have I grown from this experience? Did you put your story out there? Fantastic! You stretched yourself! Instead of hiding your talents under a bushel, you had faith that there is purpose in what you are doing. And with each critique of your work, you are getting tougher skin. You are growing in your craft. You are stepping forward and becoming more who you were meant to be.

There will always be critics, sometimes even unkind ones. But if we shift our perspective, work on building ourselves up instead of beating ourselves up, then we will come out stronger, wiser, and better writers in the end.

~*~

There is nothing Connilyn Cossette likes better than digging into the rich ancient world of the Bible and uncovering buried gems of grace that point toward Jesus. Her debut novel, Counted With the Stars: Out from Egypt Series, recently released through Bethany House Publishers. Connect with her at www.connilyncossette.com.