Merry Christmas!

I don’t know if you’ve had time to work on your bestseller during this busy season, but I’m back with my two favorite editors with tips on navigating the sometime murky waters of critique/craft partners.

(AAT) What do you do when you receive a critique and it’s not what you want to see, read or hear?

(EM) Well, as far as you putting your feelings aside and you’re no longer sensitive? Twenty-three years into this and that has not happened yet. I’m still sensitive when it comes to my writing, no matter how hard I try. Anytime I receive suggestions, it has a sharp edge to it. Even though it’s not true, in my own mind, it feels like I’ve failed. One thing I‘ve learned for me, is I need to process. I’ve learned to tell my critique partners, I accept that, I think that’s a valuable comment. I’m going to have to go home and play with it and see how I feel about it. I can’t just immediately jump up and down and say “Oh goodie, you’ve made it better.” I have to say “thank you for the work you’ve done” and I have to go home and process. That’s the way it works for me personally because it always feels like I’ve failed.

(AAT) Beth, what about you?

(BKV) Becoming valuable, reliable, trustworthy critique/craft partners, takes time. I found in the beginning of the critique groups I was in, we were too nice to each other.  We weren’t giving each other valuable feedback. We were saying, “Oh love this, like that.” We were really wasting each other’s time. It actually takes a couple of months before you get comfortable enough to give each other valuable feedback. Once you’ve become established and comfortable and are able to say this is really what’s working and this is really what’s not working. Then you actually start growing as critique partners. Now you trust each other to say both what is working and what’s not working. It takes time to build trust between writers. Really the first couple of months of a new critique group, they don’t count. You are just developing a relationship with each other. When we brought a new member into our group, we let them know, we were an established writing group and we were going to treat them as a member who had been with us for a while. We were going to bring them right up to speed and give them a trial period, but were not going to necessarily be “polite” with them. This was a professional writer’s group and we were going to treat them as a professional and give constructive criticism. It wasn’t about being “polite.” That was something we developed over time. Edie, do you agree?

(EM) I definitely agree. It depends on the dynamic of the group. I have been in critique groups where the initial getting to know each other phase is more brutal than polite. I have also been in groups that have been established and done really well and suddenly it begins to go toxic. You either take steps to correct that or you need to get out while you still can. A toxic critique group can do a great deal of damage to your career and also to your own confidence level.

Thanks Beth and Edie. As always your insight is invaluable!

What steps have you taken upon receiving less than great critiques?